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The definition for self-mastery on Dr. Google is boring as shit.
Actually, let me just pull it up here for your viewing pleasure.
Self-Mastery:
the ability to control one's own desires or impulses
While this is a great definition for social studies, this isn’t what we are talking about when I say self-mastery, my love.
WHAT IS SELF-MASTERY THEN?
In my experience it has been:
The path to repeatedly transcend all that holds you back.
It the transmutation of your shadow self.
It is the spiritual, mental, emotional, physical you, taken care of.
Self-mastery is your compass and your end goal.
It is getting acquainted with all you are and all you are not.
It is an orientation of choosing growth, like a flower always growing facing the sun.
It is a never-ending journey of becoming→being→becoming→being.
Self-Mastery is a search through the Universe for your place in it.
Endless evolution.
If all of this sounds like woo-woo (gimicky and fake), it may be because self-mastery isn’t a script or a to-do list. The concept of “you” can be seen as an abstract thing unless you attach titles and accolades to it.
In self-mastery, the basis is creation. You are your own creator.
You are the master of your life. You steer your ship. You take you where ever you want to go.
Not to sound crass but that isn’t for everyone. Did you know that only 1% of people actually reach self-actualization in their lives?
You know that pyramid you’ve seen in school a bajillion times?
Only 1% of adults reach the top of this thing in their life-times!
Why do only 1% reach this?
Because its a hard-ass journey you have to choose to continuously go on.
Professionally I have worked as a nurse practitioner, but I’m going to bring you back to my 16 year old days when I worked at McDonalds.
At McDonalds, there were SEVERAL (nearly 95%) employees who were over age 50. The custodian was like 70.
95% were living over half their lives and no one was fulfilled. Not one.
When I asked them why they were working at McDonalds, they would reply because they had self-proclaimed that this was as far as they could go, and resigned to accepting that this is how life is.
As though life was SUPPOSED to ALWAYS SUCK ASS.
I’m sure these guys had their fair share of accomplishments and I’m not here to judge anyone’s path, but choosing to not be fulfilled or reach your highest potential isn’t something I could get behind.
I was a lost 16 year old who had her own series of unfortunate events in childhood. I lived low-income in a house with rented rooms and a mom doing the best she could while dealing with trauma of her own.
Maybe it was because I had already experienced the lowest of lows by age 16, but this sight at McDonalds? It impacted me tremendously.
“Shit could get WORSE? It could NEVER END???!”
The key word there is could.
It translated to me that life COULD continue being shitty if you LET IT.
“Could” was definitely not a chance I was willing to take.
So the first thing I did was go to University because that was the next obvious and easiest choice society made apparent for me to not end up in McDonalds Stockholm.
Through undergraduate and graduate school, I was able to secure a lifestyle that kept me away from the “could happen” fear of ending up back in french fry soul famine.
But I didn’t focus on the life I COULD create for myself that was AUTHENTIC. I was focused on survival.
I was running from Stockholm hell not knowing I was just in an alternate form of it - working for someone else, disconnected from myself, dissociated and riddled with the effects of Complex PSTD, not knowing my purpose…but at least I was doing it from a nice car.
I still didn’t understand that I had only accomplished the bottom of that pyramid (food, shelter, security) and I hadn’t reached the top yet.
To be fair, I would not have realized who the fuck I was without having to navigate through that life.
Any Earthly accomplishment at the bottom of the pyramid is a fundamental step to the top.
“I couldn’t have found God in the seminary, he thought, as he looked at the sunrise.”
But I didn’t understand that I had to choose to pursue higher purpose and self-mastery even now being a professional and having it all “supposedly” together.
I began to:
Dive deeper into belief systems I held.
Developed a relationship with myself through multiple techniques.
Found a relationship with my higher power.
I began to pay attention to my body.
Underwent paradigm shifts related to my mortality.
I became trauma informed and earned my trauma coaching certification.
Am building a personal brand.
I now attribute what I’ve learned about self-mastery over the last 4 years to spirituality and wellness.
And my learning is still going 🙂 Thats because:
Self-mastery is a journey to get to and a journey to go on.
It is something you can choose to do at any time in your life and sometimes, life will force you to face that decision before you’re ready.
Everything you have been through is a step in the right direction to achieving your grandest vision and purpose.
EVERYTHING you’ve experienced is useful material in the construction of YOU.
The important part is to choose it. Self-mastery is a choice you make to push your existence to its maximum purpose and transcend the shadows that bind you.
If you’ve signed up for this newsletter, it is because you’re not someone who would’ve accepted McDonalds Stockholm as your philosophy. Kudos to you!
Through these newsletters, my goal is to guide you to the 1%, to your own journey of self-mastery through sharing my philosophies.
I’ll provide ideas, perspective shifts, inspiration, and more!
Now if that “woo-woo” doesn’t make you go WHOOP-WHOOP! then you need to lay off those french-fries.
You are not alone.